One of the best things you can do to keep a guy interested is to take an active interest in something he loves to do. The key is to choose something you can actually see yourself doing (if he’s into rock climbing and you’re scared of heights, you may want to go in a different direction), but the point is to let him know you’re willing to try new things — especially things that he’s really into. Whether it’s golf, hiking, surfing or watching obscure French films in black and white, if there’s something he does that you end up enjoying, you’ll be much more likely to bond and keep him coming back for more.
“Without a doubt when you show a man you can hang or are interested in areas he doesn’t believe you are (especially in the beginning), he will look at you in a whole different light. And not only that, he will feel some chivalrous loyalty to take on an interest in what you like… and ladies, that’s exactly what you really desire… him to not blow off your interests.” — Vinny Degennaro
Highlight your talents
If you do something really well — take amazing photos, throw and catch like a professional baseball player or cook circles around any Iron Chef — don’t be afraid to show off your skills. Being good at something helps you stand apart from the pack and makes you more intriguing to guys, plus your skills help boost your confidence — another trait guys gravitate toward. There’s no need to be overly boastful but do make sure to let him know what you’re capable of.
“I would say yes. I’m clearly not a part of the dating scene anymore but even on a friend level, I want to connect with people who bring interesting things into my life. Special talents and unique interests are life enriching for both people in the relationship.” — David Ciancio
Have a sense of humor
Being able to make a guy laugh and being able to laugh with him are very important ingredients for keeping a guy interested. Laughter is a bonding experience and if you can make him smile with your clever wit, deadpan delivery or sassy sarcasm, he’s likely to stick around. Not to mention that people who have a good sense of humor usually don’t take themselves too seriously, which for a lot of guys can be a huge turn-off. So don’t be afraid to show your funny side — making him laugh will make him want to keep spending time with you.
“I love a woman who has a great sense of humor. It’s essential to a relationship. If you can’t laugh with and at your significant other, then there’s a problem. My wife (of 10 years) and I laugh with and at each other all the time… it keeps us both on our toes!“ — Sean-Patrick Hillman
The most recent AskMen.com Great Male Survey indicated that a sense of caring and nurturing was the second most important trait for men deciding if a woman was relationship material. We’re not suggesting you become his mother, start cleaning up after him or doing his grocery shopping, but being there when he needs support or listening when he needs someone to talk to is important when building a bond with someone new and letting them know you want to be a larger part of their life.
“The support has to be genuine. Even if she’s not completely on board with your destination, she’s got to believe in or, ideally, admire the character and sacrifice it takes for you to get there. Anything less will become an issue in time.” — Matt Clark
Put effort into your appearance
Looks aren’t everything and let’s face it — a lot of guys we know think as long as something isn’t covered in stains it can be worn to almost any event, but guys do enjoy feeling like you’ve made an effort for them. We’re not suggesting you wear a full face of makeup at all times, but if after the fourth date you’re already answering the door in sweatpants, you might want to rethink your strategy for keeping your new guy interested. There’s no need for cocktail dresses and stilettos, but do opt for something polished and pulled together.
“I 100 percent disagree!!! I think this is an age thing. Once you mature past a certain point, you want what’s real! Of course it’s nice to get dressed up from time to time and go somewhere more upscale… But that’s not every day… Anyone can look nice going to a wedding, in fact, You SHOULD look nice then. But I want to know how someone will look on a nice, relaxing night. So unless you are going to be dolled up all the time, show me how you look in a ponytail and sweats. That’s real!!” — John Sterople
Have other things to do
Having your own interests and hobbies is another important aspect of keeping guys attracted to you. Doing your own thing means you won’t be instantly dependent on him and wanting to hang out 24/7 (which can seem clingy), plus when you do see him, you’ll have more to talk about. Devoting all of your attention to the guy you like may seem like a good idea, but being too available too soon can make you seem desperate, which can be a huge turn-off to some guys. “I won’t date a girl who doesn’t have any interests outside just hanging out with me,” says a 34-year-old financial planner we spoke with about what keeps him interested. “I just think it’s really cool when a girl is passionate about something.”